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<table border="0" cellpadding="3" cellspacing="1" width="100%" class="forumline"> <tr> <th class="thCornerL" width="22%" height="26">Autor</th> <th class="thCornerR">Wiadomość</th> </tr> <tr> <td width="22%" align="left" valign="top" class="row1"><span class="name"><a name=""></a><b>0419ypuikf</b></span></td> <td class="row1" height="28" valign="top"><table width="100%" border="0" cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"> <tr> <td width="100%"><img src="http://picsrv.fora.pl/Aniseed/images/icon_minipost.gif" width="12" height="9" alt="Post" title="Post" border="0" /><span class="postdetails">Wysłany: Pią 17:13, 13 Maj 2011<span class="gen"> </span> Temat postu: Coach Sunglasses Outlet Online Relationships Tips</span></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><hr /></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2"><span class="postbody">n I want relationships tips, I have learned to look for folks who focus on strengths and I look for folks who have a long track record of research. <br />Researchers are curious folks, who have learned to apply the scientific method to questions they have, and I really value the insights those folks gather up. <br />I have been involved in domestic violence psychoeduction for about 20 years now, and family violence is a serious issue with long lasting repercussions for the perpatrator, the victim, and the children who may witness it, or who live in stress. <br />As part of my program, I have always taught skills so that when my clients leave my program, they know the difference between power and control relationships and offering choice in relationship. <br />The researchers whose work has been most valuable to me over the years have been John and his wife Julie Gottman, LCSW., and Doc Childre and his Heartmath folks, and more recently, I have grown to really appreciate the work of Helen Fisher,Ph.D. and most recently, Robert Epstein,<a href="http://www.oddshift.com/pg/blog/0419fhuera/read/928644/coach-coupons-high-tech-pest-repellants-are-useful" target="_blank" class="postlink">Coach Coupons High Tech Pest Repellants Are Useful</a>,<a href="http://www.coach-factory-outlet-online.com/coach-sunglasses" target="_blank" class="postlink">Coach Sunglasses Outlet Online</a>, has thrown us a challenge about building intimacy. <br />Relationships Tips from The Art and Science of Love <br />The Art and Science of Love is a workshop the Gottman's put together for those of us who cannot get to one of their in person workshops to use, and use it I have with my domestic violence folks. <br />The workshop is composed of a series of written exercises for couples to use, and accompanying videos, that teach the skills that the Gottman's have observed the Masters of Marriage using over their 30 years of doing this work. <br />I can really appreciate their model because they include important physiological measures in their observations,<a href="http://www.coach-factory-outlet-online.com/coach-purses" target="_blank" class="postlink">Coach Purses Outlet</a>, and make very sophisticated interpretations of non-verbal communication. <br />Why is non-verbal communication important to measure? Well, if you read FLOW by Mihalyi Czikszentmihalyi, on page 28, he says that we process emotional communications made through facial and tonal messages in packets of seven bits at the same time, and the shortest time between packets of data is 1/18th second. <br />1/18th second is about twice as fast as I can blink my eyes, and I can change my hormonal bath from DHEA the antiaging hormone to adrenalin and cortisol that fast, and if I am not prepared, my body will begin to move in ways that definitely harm the relationship, so the fact that the Gottman's pay attention to non-verbal communications is vital in my estimation. <br />Relationships Tips from the Heart <br />No one knew too long ago that the heart had its own affiliative and cooperative nervous system, a brain of its own, a brain which can learn and make decisions independently of any other brain I have. <br />In fact the heart feeds much more data up than the brain sends down, and if I learn to keep my heart rate coherent,<a href="http://normania.net/swift/index.php?topic=102209.msg163656#msg163656" target="_blank" class="postlink">Coach Wallets Outlet Online A Chimney Sweep's Job Is Not Easy</a>, using Doc Childre's heart rate variability tool, I can learn to access my higher perceptual centers in conversation with my mate. <br />Just above I mentioned that I can respond to non-verbal communications very rapidly, for example, a look of contempt, in 1/25th second, according to Paul who has worked for 25 years to catalog human facial expressions. <br />1/25th second is even faster than Czikszentmihalyi's 1/18th second, isn't it, so doesn't it make sense to learn a skill which allows me to manage my physiology in a heart beat? To me it does, and I have learned the Heartmath process and taught it to many couples so that they can work on the heart beat of their relationship. <br />Heart rate variability biofeedback feels good, and once I have a few practices on the computer with the program, my heart will learn the cue, and provide me an affiliative and coherent heart beat which allows me to manage my response to non-verbal communications heart beat by heart beat. <br />I can get in the habit of cuing coherence in my heart beat and body by using my cue thought (I like to pic</span></td> </tr> </table></td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="2" height="1" class="spaceRow"><img src="http://picsrv.fora.pl/Aniseed/images/spacer.gif" alt="" width="1" height="1" /></td> </tr> </table>
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