cgparis2010
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Wysłany: Pon 14:02, 21 Mar 2011 Temat postu: True Love Waits Until Nighttime How I Devirginize |
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All through my youth, I probably would have said I was a Christian. It was just the deult. My parents did take me to church when I was little, I grabbed from the tin of sugar-cookies and drank dixie cups of watery Kool-Aid, but I had somehow remained a bit feral.
In high school, the bulk of the popular kids were religious. They rallied to get the Ten Commandments posted in our school, they went on Southern Baptist retreats and wore bedazzled W(hat) W(ould) J(esus) D(o) T-shirts. I knew I didn’t want to be one of them. In any highly religious town, there has to be a flipside. During lunch I smoked cigarettes in the bathroom, wearing eyeliner and flared Mudd jeans—good girls wore Gap. When I lost my virginity at 15, I felt relieved. I still would have probably said I was Christian, but now I was definitely not going to be caught getting baptized.
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I grew up in a small town. It was in the heartland—the middle of the country, yet everyone had twangy Southern accents. The town didn’t have much money or restaurants or people. But we did have churches. Churches in pole-barns,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], churches whose congregations were made up of only one mily, churches in the hills with members who spoke in tongues and ncy churches with stained glass that told you to vote for George Bush.
Amongst the other Christian punk kids, it wasn’t a huge deal that we were having . A lot of them were too. One was having with his girlfriend, but only anal, to preserve her virginity. The thing that most stands out to me about these kids is that they were super -obsessed but super -negative. Like, one time we all went to a Goldfinger show and afterward a car of girls slap-happily flashed us. They booed and yelled at other cars to not look at these ugly sluts.
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As I liked to say in those days: True Love Waits … until nighttime. In mine and Tim’s case, it waited a whole two months. Soon we were having four times a night. Role-playing in costumes, snapping naked Polaroids. We’d jump each other’s bones before church,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], and in the car after church on the way to his Grandma’s for Sunday dinner.
I grew up in a small, conservative town. Needless to say, people did not have the healthiest attitudes about .
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In exploring my teenage angst, I fell into the local punmudd shoesk rock scene. It was small and fiercely Southern Baptist. These kids played shows in church basements, covering MXPX and Slick Shoes. Afterward, they listened to The Dead Milkmen and NOFX and smashed mailboxes. These were kids who loved working in hell houses on Halloween—Christian haunted houses that depict people sinning in various ways (pre-marital , abortion,[link widoczny dla zalogowanych], doing drugs) then going to hell. The last room is usually heaven. Then they ask you at the end if you want to be saved, and funnel you into a room to sign up for baptism.
But as a 16-year-old, seduced by checkered Vans and studded belts, I found my match in this scene. Tim was older, 21, and a True Love Waits virgin. True Love Waits is a contract that you have with, like, God and the community or something. It is a vow that you will not have until you’re married. The church-going kids would bring the contracts to school and teachers would pass them out during class, encouraging us to sign. Afterward, the names of kids who signed would run in the town’s news. Which also printed the names of everyone who’d been arrested that day and for what.
And even though he was in college, he was terrified of his parents finding out. My parents let me go on the Pill, but watching him double bag and hide condoms, I understood how a lot of the kids couldn’t just ask their parents about . It made sense how each year, a girl or two in my class of fifty got knocked up.
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I think my sister and I were the only kids who didn’t put on white robes to get dunked in front of the congregation.
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